The Law of Emotional Connection

The Law of Emotional Connection

Emotional Connection

The Law of Attraction is a multi-billion dollar industry that has as many critics as it does fans. Its fans rave over its benefits, while its critics point out flaws in its approach and its inability to be measured.

Whatever side of the coin you fall on, there’s another angle that – to me – is more effective and is a prerequisite to any law of attraction, and that’s the Law of Emotional Connection.

Note – don’t worry, I’m not about to go all artsy fartsy on you, this is still just a blog post!

The Problem With Attraction

For years, marketers and advertisers have been trying to generate revenue through attracting eyeballs to brands and products. Usually, many campaigns will go for the quick hit – a big launch, lots of cool words and media, and a call-to-action that pins you back in your seat and makes you say, “Hell yeah!”.

The problem with this is that it’s basically just the law of attraction at work. You make something attractive; your audience finds you (product/brand) attractive; and the sale is completed. Then the cycle ends, and a new one begins, often for thousands (if not millions) of dollars.

It’s kinda like a new couple just beginning to date – initial attraction, but then the buzz wears off, and if there’s nothing left after that, the next step is usually going separate ways. Now, if you’re a big business with a big fund for marketing and advertising, then maybe you can keep this cycle going. The rest of us, though? We need to work on more than attraction.

We need to work on connection, too, and not just any connection, but emotional connection.

The Law of Emotional Connection

My grandfather was a proud, stubborn man – a typical product of his generation, a Scotsman who never took no for an answer even when that was the only answer left. He was married to the same woman for more than 40 years before she passed, and it devastated him.

He began to shrink in stature and voice, and it was almost like watching a giant become a normal person. We tried everything to help but, like I say, he was stubborn.

Then he heard an advert on the radio for a community meeting group in his area. It specialized in lonely, elderly people, and helped connect them to others in the same boat. Now, normally my grandfather would ignore this – “a bunch of scammy shite!”, would be his description – but this advert was different.

Because it tapped into his emotions and connections to his generation.

  • It had music from the ‘twenties in the background, and this reminded him of the dance halls he’d wooed my grandmother in.
  • It had an old-school radio announcer voice, so it reminded him of the war, and the community spirit that was built in Britain while Hitler was destroying its cities with bomber runs.
  • And it had a sympathetic yet emotional message about people of his age and how there are fewer friends to connect with as time goes by.

Simply put, it made my granddad think of all the great times he’d had and how he could still have them, even if the love of his life wasn’t there to spend these times with him.

So he called the company, started going to the meet-ups, and never looked back. He met wonderful people and began to live his life again. And he said it was the best decision he ever made.

The Connection Generation

Iggy Pintado wrote a great book called The Connection Generation, on how different generations are using technology to connect better and overcome stereotypes and barriers. I think the title is a great way for marketers and advertisers to look at how they’re currently trying to attract eyeballs, and really get past the attraction mindset and into the emotional connection arena.

Some are doing this already – think ads targeted at parents with the sole aim of getting their kids so excited about a product that there’s no way a parent can’t get it without being the worst parent in the world.

So emotional marketing is nothing new. But emotional connection marketing? That – to me, anyhoo – is still pretty untapped. Yet there’s no reason that it should be.

We have an unbelievable amount of tools at our fingertips that can tell us what people are buying; how they’re buying; when they’re buying; and a lot of what triggers their buying actions.

Yet many businesses aren’t looking at these as a key connector to their customers. Instead, they’re just seeing costs and another techy thing that they have to invest in.

But think about it. If you run a small brick and mortar business, you know your customers. You know their birthdays. You know their children’s names, likes and dislikes. You know if their pet is ill.

Because you talk. And listen. And connect.

Why should that be any different online? In fact, it’s easier, because you’re getting to know your customers and their likes, dislikes and buying triggers without them even coming into your “store”. And you can also bootstrap your costs if you’re working to a limited budget.

So isn’t it about time you started using that information and build on connecting with products and services based on actual wants and needs, as opposed to what you feel we should be attracted to?

Because if you don’t, others will. So – ready to connect?

image: Sterneck

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Danny Brown
Co-author Influence Marketing: How to Create, Manage and Measure Brand Influencers in Social Media Marketing. #1 marketing blog in world as per HubSpot. Husband. Father. Optimist. Pragmatist. Never says no to a good single malt. You can find me on Twitter - Google+ - LinkedIn.
206 comments
Danny Brown
Danny Brown

Thanks, miss, and love your avatar!!! :)

Judy Dunn
Judy Dunn

Good post, Danny. Easy to attract, a little harder to connect emotionally, but it is so worth it. And you are right, not many businesses are doing this, so you really become that "red leaf" as John Jantsch says, when you do.

Judy Dunn
Judy Dunn

Good post, Danny. Easy to attract, a little harder to connect emotionally, but it is so worth it. And you are right, not many businesses are doing this, so you really become that "red leaf" as John Jantsch says, when you do.

Maria Reyes McDavis
Maria Reyes McDavis

This is so good danny and you're right, too often overlooked by so many!

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

Thanks for the kind words Nancy, and completely agree - small is flexible is more keyed for success because of that. :)

Maria Reyes McDavis
Maria Reyes McDavis

This is so good danny and you're right, too often overlooked by so many!

Nancy Denmark
Nancy Denmark

another good post from Danny Brown. (the blog comments are a good read too) says the lady with 2 small businesses supporting her household. It's all about connecting with the customers to build long term relationships. That's our only way to compete with the big box stores. They can't provide that personal connection and thankfully there are still folks out there who still appreciate it and they keep us in business!

Nancy Denmark
Nancy Denmark

another good post from Danny Brown. (the blog comments are a good read too) says the lady with 2 small businesses supporting her household. It's all about connecting with the customers to build long term relationships. That's our only way to compete with the big box stores. They can't provide that personal connection and thankfully there are still folks out there who still appreciate it and they keep us in business!

Vanie
Vanie

I really like this post Danny because I really need an article on the subject of emotional connection. Thanks a lot :)

Vanie
Vanie

I really like this post Danny because I really need an article on the subject of emotional connection. Thanks a lot :)

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Danny

As a proud, stubborn Scotsman, like your Grandfather :-)i love your blog and this article in particular. Keep up the great work you are doing.

So many people see digital as just another sales channel rather than for building strong 1-to-1 relationships especially with your 'Most Valuable' and 'Most Growable' customers.

Do you know where in Scotland your Grandfather came from? Take care Jim H

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Danny

As a proud, stubborn Scotsman, like your Grandfather :-)i love your blog and this article in particular. Keep up the great work you are doing.

So many people see digital as just another sales channel rather than for building strong 1-to-1 relationships especially with your 'Most Valuable' and 'Most Growable' customers.

Do you know where in Scotland your Grandfather came from? Take care Jim H

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Danny As a proud, stubborn Scotsman, like your Grandfather :-)i love your blog and this article in particular. Keep up the great work you are doing. So many people see digital as just another sales channel rather than for building strong 1-to-1 relationships especially with your 'Most Valuable' and 'Most Growable' customers. Do you know where in Scotland your Grandfather came from? Take care Jim H

chicka
chicka

wow..you got a lot of comment on this article. it proves that personal story really does affect on people's emotion

chicka
chicka

wow..you got a lot of comment on this article. it proves that personal story really does affect on people's emotion

Ana | Traffic Generation
Ana | Traffic Generation

You're a great story-teller, Danny and it is clear from the comments that I am not the only one to think that. But you also know how to get a message across in a story with a lesson - that's a great talent! I believe in the law of connection too. By being yourself and connecting with your audience, you can easily start to make this connection.

Ana | Traffic Generation
Ana | Traffic Generation

You're a great story-teller, Danny and it is clear from the comments that I am not the only one to think that. But you also know how to get a message across in a story with a lesson - that's a great talent! I believe in the law of connection too. By being yourself and connecting with your audience, you can easily start to make this connection.

Tim
Tim

Nice article on emotional connection. Just breaking into marketing myself. Good read!

Tim
Tim

Nice article on emotional connection. Just breaking into marketing myself. Good read!

Extreme John
Extreme John

This post is awesome Danny! There is indeed clearly a big difference between emotional marketing and emotional connection marketing. Your granddad's story was very inspiring and it moved me as a small business owner. It was such a good example of how effective and customer-driven emotional connection can be for any business.

Extreme John
Extreme John

This post is awesome Danny! There is indeed clearly a big difference between emotional marketing and emotional connection marketing. Your granddad's story was very inspiring and it moved me as a small business owner. It was such a good example of how effective and customer-driven emotional connection can be for any business.

Extreme John
Extreme John

This post is awesome Danny! There is indeed clearly a big difference between emotional marketing and emotional connection marketing. Your granddad's story was very inspiring and it moved me as a small business owner. It was such a good example of how effective and customer-driven emotional connection can be for any business.

Craig McBreen
Craig McBreen

OH Shite, this is a great post :) Emotional Connection Marketing is indeed untapped, but as you illustrated so well, the problem is CONVINCING businesses how important this is. And whether they like it or not, it is the future. Social media is all about creating authentic connections of course, the most difficult part is getting businesses on board and "ready to connect" based on their customers actual wants and needs.

Anyway, long time lurker, first time poster! Working my arse off to get a new blog up and running. Thanks for such thought provoking posts and excellent all around work!

Craig McBreen
Craig McBreen

OH Shite, this is a great post :) Emotional Connection Marketing is indeed untapped, but as you illustrated so well, the problem is CONVINCING businesses how important this is. And whether they like it or not, it is the future. Social media is all about creating authentic connections of course, the most difficult part is getting businesses on board and "ready to connect" based on their customers actual wants and needs. Anyway, long time lurker, first time poster! Working my arse off to get a new blog up and running. Thanks for such thought provoking posts and excellent all around work!

farouk
farouk

its my first time here but i am glad i reached your blog. amazing work and great post :))

farouk
farouk

its my first time here but i am glad i reached your blog. amazing work and great post :))

Marianne Worley
Marianne Worley

Thank you for telling the story of your granddad. My Grandma recently moved into assisted living, and she's slowly becoming more social. When I'm working on a marketing project, I'm always try to create messages that will make emotional connections. My job is to figure out what we need to fulfill, and then communicate appropriate messaging.

Danny
Danny

Hi there Jim,

Cheers, mate. My granddad was from Edinburgh (like me - I just pretend to be Canadian when it suits, hehe).

The sad thing is, if you use digital to its strengths, it becomes a strong sales channel anyhoo. Go figure... ;-)

Danny
Danny

Hi there Jim, Cheers, mate. My granddad was from Edinburgh (like me - I just pretend to be Canadian when it suits, hehe). The sad thing is, if you use digital to its strengths, it becomes a strong sales channel anyhoo. Go figure... ;-)

Danny
Danny

Thanks, Ana - must be the frustrated children's story book writer I have in me. ;-)

Danny
Danny

Thanks, Ana - must be the frustrated children's story book writer I have in me. ;-)

Danny
Danny

Hey there big guy,

You know, I might be a mean old Scotsman but you touch my emotions and I'll cry like a baby.

Imagine the power a business could have if it could tap into that kind of lowering of the guard? ;-)

Cheers, mate!

Danny
Danny

Hey there big guy, You know, I might be a mean old Scotsman but you touch my emotions and I'll cry like a baby. Imagine the power a business could have if it could tap into that kind of lowering of the guard? ;-) Cheers, mate!

Danny
Danny

Hey there Craig,

Does your surname mean you pronounce shite in the accent that befits it? ;-)

The funny thing is, businesses connect every day of the week with their customers whenever they hear a door open, or a phone ring. And they often barter and set up lines of credit because the customer needs it.

So why not take it to its natural progression? Ah well...

Great to see you "de-cloak", and don't be afraid to say more, mate. :)

Danny
Danny

Hey there Craig, Does your surname mean you pronounce shite in the accent that befits it? ;-) The funny thing is, businesses connect every day of the week with their customers whenever they hear a door open, or a phone ring. And they often barter and set up lines of credit because the customer needs it. So why not take it to its natural progression? Ah well... Great to see you "de-cloak", and don't be afraid to say more, mate. :)

Danny
Danny

Thanks, Farouk, and don't be a stranger :)

Danny
Danny

Thanks, Farouk, and don't be a stranger :)

Danny
Danny

You know, often we hear so many horror stories about assisted living, Marianne, but if we can find the good ones then, like your Grandma is finding, they can be a Godsend. :)

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Danny - thanks for replying. Indeed, very impressed by your efforts to reply to most/all of the comments you receive.

Sorry to hear that you originate from Edinburgh :-)I live in Scotland's real capital city Glasgow :-) although i did start my academic career at Napier University in Ed.

Just mentioned your Granda and you in a recent blog post about Inbound Marketing - hope you don't mind. Its a 'tongue in cheek' customer response to a HubSpot Workshop I attended on Friday. It references 2 of your own recent posts - the Emotional Connection and 'Flock Off' one. Only a Scotsman could get away with that one - loved it. All the best and take care Jim H

Just in case you have the time to read it, the post is entitled 'I am not a suspect' - http://energise2-0.com/2011/06/18/i-am-not-a-suspect/

Cheers mate.

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Danny - thanks for replying. Indeed, very impressed by your efforts to reply to most/all of the comments you receive.

Sorry to hear that you originate from Edinburgh :-)I live in Scotland's real capital city Glasgow :-) although i did start my academic career at Napier University in Ed.

Just mentioned your Granda and you in a recent blog post about Inbound Marketing - hope you don't mind. Its a 'tongue in cheek' customer response to a HubSpot Workshop I attended on Friday. It references 2 of your own recent posts - the Emotional Connection and 'Flock Off' one. Only a Scotsman could get away with that one - loved it. All the best and take care Jim H

Just in case you have the time to read it, the post is entitled 'I am not a suspect' - http://energise2-0.com/2011/06/18/i-am-not-a-suspect/

Cheers mate.

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Danny - thanks for replying. Indeed, very impressed by your efforts to reply to most/all of the comments you receive. Sorry to hear that you originate from Edinburgh :-)I live in Scotland's real capital city Glasgow :-) although i did start my academic career at Napier University in Ed. Just mentioned your Granda and you in a recent blog post about Inbound Marketing - hope you don't mind. Its a 'tongue in cheek' customer response to a HubSpot Workshop I attended on Friday. It references 2 of your own recent posts - the Emotional Connection and 'Flock Off' one. Only a Scotsman could get away with that one - loved it. All the best and take care Jim H Just in case you have the time to read it, the post is entitled 'I am not a suspect' - http://energise2-0.com/2011/06/18/i-am-not-a-suspect/ Cheers mate.

Craig McBreen
Craig McBreen

No, just a reaction to your post on censorship :) I was afraid if I spelled out the actual words I might get spanked by the blogging police. I only dream of having an Irish, or better yet, Scottish accent. After all when I was a kid I dreamed of being the original 007, Sean Connery. But, I'm just an pretending here is Seattle.

I do feel like this is a "de-cloaking" of sorts. Love the content here in your neck of the woods!

Craig McBreen
Craig McBreen

No, just a reaction to your post on censorship :) I was afraid if I spelled out the actual words I might get spanked by the blogging police. I only dream of having an Irish, or better yet, Scottish accent. After all when I was a kid I dreamed of being the original 007, Sean Connery. But, I'm just an pretending here is Seattle.

I do feel like this is a "de-cloaking" of sorts. Love the content here in your neck of the woods!

Craig McBreen
Craig McBreen

No, just a reaction to your post on censorship :) I was afraid if I spelled out the actual words I might get spanked by the blogging police. I only dream of having an Irish, or better yet, Scottish accent. After all when I was a kid I dreamed of being the original 007, Sean Connery. But, I'm just an pretending here is Seattle. I do feel like this is a "de-cloaking" of sorts. Love the content here in your neck of the woods!

Danny
Danny

That's a shame, mate. I've heard similar feedback from a few others - I thought Hubspot was a bit different from the rest, too.

Seems to be a one size fits all as opposed to a targeted approach?

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Thanks Danny. To be perfectly honest I was very concerned with much of the advice given at the Hubspot workshop and the 'mindset' underlying their view of customers.

Blog frequently, spread the message as wide as possible, flood the sales funnel with suspects, turn suspects into prospects, convert etc etc. As someone who has taught Customer Management at Strathclyde Uni for over 20 years, this terminology sits uneasily with me.

Take care

Jim H

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Thanks Danny. To be perfectly honest I was very concerned with much of the advice given at the Hubspot workshop and the 'mindset' underlying their view of customers.

Blog frequently, spread the message as wide as possible, flood the sales funnel with suspects, turn suspects into prospects, convert etc etc. As someone who has taught Customer Management at Strathclyde Uni for over 20 years, this terminology sits uneasily with me.

Take care

Jim H

Danny
Danny

Hey there Jim,

Glasgow, eh? I guess we all have our crosses to bear... ;-)

Thanks for the mention, mate, much appreciated, and I'll be sure to check out the post.

How was the Hubspot workshop?

Danny
Danny

That's a shame, mate. I've heard similar feedback from a few others - I thought Hubspot was a bit different from the rest, too. Seems to be a one size fits all as opposed to a targeted approach?

Dr Jim Hamill
Dr Jim Hamill

Thanks Danny. To be perfectly honest I was very concerned with much of the advice given at the Hubspot workshop and the 'mindset' underlying their view of customers. Blog frequently, spread the message as wide as possible, flood the sales funnel with suspects, turn suspects into prospects, convert etc etc. As someone who has taught Customer Management at Strathclyde Uni for over 20 years, this terminology sits uneasily with me. Take care Jim H

Danny
Danny

Hey there Jim, Glasgow, eh? I guess we all have our crosses to bear... ;-) Thanks for the mention, mate, much appreciated, and I'll be sure to check out the post. How was the Hubspot workshop?

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