Opinions are great. They allow people to share their thoughts on something, and contribute to a conversation that otherwise may have passed them by.

Opposing opinions are even better, as they stop us from becoming too ego-centric and full of our own bunkum. Opposing opinions can make us re-evaluate our viewpoints with fact and make us better people for learning new ideas.

Of course, the problem with having opposing opinions to something is that, often, the people you’re questioning don’t like it. So they get snarky. Or, if that person’s a blogger, their adoring fans respond to your comment with a “Haters gonna hate” reply.

Seriously, what the f*ck does that have to do with anything?

Because someone doesn’t have their nose up your demigod’s ass too, all of a sudden that makes them a hater? Get real.

You want hate? Try being gay in Jamaica. Or try being ethnic in some parts of Canada. Or try being a woman in Afghanistan. Or try expressing your civil rights in Equatorial Guinea.

That’s hate, right there. Where your life is about as valued as dog crap. The people living in these places and experiencing that hate every day would laugh in your face if you said an opinion on a blog post, or an online thought, meant you were a hater.

The sad thing is, it’s becoming more common to use the “haters gonna hate” excuse for countering a different opinion. I’ve seen social media leaders use it, or not do anything to discourage it in their readers, and I’ve seen people use it more when someone expresses a valid opinion or counter-point.

Here’s the thing though – the “haters gonna hate” exuse? It’s just a lame cop out by people that have usually been called out on crap, and have nothing valid to respond with. It means your ass has been handed to you, and all you can come up with is the person that just handed you your ass is obviously a hater.

Trouble is, others see that you’ve been called out too with a valid counterpoint. And coming back with a “haters gonna hate” soundbite just makes you look as lame as the term itself.

Especially when you put it into context alongside real hate in the world…

image: kenfagerdotcom

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225 comments
ShahKhadem
ShahKhadem

The guy who posted this actually makes some very valid and good points.

ShahKhadem
ShahKhadem

The guy who posted this actually makes some very valid and good points.

Chris Dennis
Chris Dennis

true...I amend my statement...also look to the intelligence of the speaker... =]

Chris Dennis
Chris Dennis

true...I amend my statement...also look to the intelligence of the speaker... =]

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

Chris - fair point. Though when it's the sole retort, you can't really look for the intend of the speaker. Besides, there are better phrases to use than "hate" which has far different connotations, regardless of the intent. ;-)

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

Chris - fair point. Though when it's the sole retort, you can't really look for the intend of the speaker. Besides, there are better phrases to use than "hate" which has far different connotations, regardless of the intent. ;-)

Chris Dennis
Chris Dennis

I have never heard it used to defend a position but, rather to comment on someone being stupid...an alternate phrase to mean ...'assholes will be assholes'....I've learned that I need to look for the intend of the speaker and not focus so hard on the dictionary version of words...keeps me off the soap boxes....

Donna Lehman
Donna Lehman

Rates up there with 'It is what it is', when someone wants to shrug off an unpleasant situation or choice. It's non-active. Dialogue and options are always possible - popular or not. I don't feel we should ever sound complacent or accepting of 'hate' speech/actions. Agree with Mike though that it's over used hyperbole in many cases. 'Aggravated by', 'annoyed', 'irritated' are more often expressed as 'I hate this or that'. Glad you raised the question Danny.

Chris Dennis
Chris Dennis

I have never heard it used to defend a position but, rather to comment on someone being stupid...an alternate phrase to mean ...'assholes will be assholes'....I've learned that I need to look for the intend of the speaker and not focus so hard on the dictionary version of words...keeps me off the soap boxes....

Donna Lehman
Donna Lehman

Rates up there with 'It is what it is', when someone wants to shrug off an unpleasant situation or choice. It's non-active. Dialogue and options are always possible - popular or not. I don't feel we should ever sound complacent or accepting of 'hate' speech/actions. Agree with Mike though that it's over used hyperbole in many cases. 'Aggravated by', 'annoyed', 'irritated' are more often expressed as 'I hate this or that'. Glad you raised the question Danny.

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

Haha, awesome comment, Mike :)

I just think it's a lazy way out of trying to defend a position - you know you've either been caught out, or someone's said a really valid point, and to save face, you automatically call someone a "hater". Meh.

Mike Ashworth
Mike Ashworth

It is lazy. ppl are unable to reason and 140 characters makes that nigh on impossible. It's like watching a teenager who hasn't developed the vocabulary to have a reasoned discussion swear at the other person or lash out physically.

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

Haha, awesome comment, Mike :)I just think it's a lazy way out of trying to defend a position - you know you've either been caught out, or someone's said a really valid point, and to save face, you automatically call someone a "hater". Meh.

Mike Ashworth
Mike Ashworth

It is lazy. ppl are unable to reason and 140 characters makes that nigh on impossible. It's like watching a teenager who hasn't developed the vocabulary to have a reasoned discussion swear at the other person or lash out physically.

Laura M Bailey
Laura M Bailey

lol we'll see. Buxom use to mean obediant and now means full-figured or large breasted... so we'll see about hate. Maybe we can start a change hate movement?

Mike Ashworth
Mike Ashworth

I wonder if the boundaries shifted? Things that used to merely tick ppl off now become hate. Maybe because saying 'so and so really ticks me off' sounds a bit lame and of course its so easy to join the baying "hate this fail that" of the keyboard warriors. Just one problem though. when you say you hate something that actually isn't that dire where does this leave someone to go for things that are really terrible? HATE in caps maybe? Loads of !!!!!!!!!! Or perhaps it actually increases their inner rage and like a pressure cooker, the anger increases until one day it explodes, in road rage, or they assault someone over some seemingly innocuous event, I've seen it happen. Or maybe they just end up hating themselves.

Laura M Bailey
Laura M Bailey

lol we'll see. Buxom use to mean obediant and now means full-figured or large breasted... so we'll see about hate. Maybe we can start a change hate movement?

Mike Ashworth
Mike Ashworth

I wonder if the boundaries shifted? Things that used to merely tick ppl off now become hate. Maybe because saying 'so and so really ticks me off' sounds a bit lame and of course its so easy to join the baying "hate this fail that" of the keyboard warriors. Just one problem though. when you say you hate something that actually isn't that dire where does this leave someone to go for things that are really terrible? HATE in caps maybe? Loads of !!!!!!!!!! Or perhaps it actually increases their inner rage and like a pressure cooker, the anger increases until one day it explodes, in road rage, or they assault someone over some seemingly innocuous event, I've seen it happen. Or maybe they just end up hating themselves.

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

True, Laura - though I'm not sure there will ever be a change in the perception of what "hate" means ;-)

Danny Brown
Danny Brown

True, Laura - though I'm not sure there will ever be a change in the perception of what "hate" means ;-)

Laura M Bailey
Laura M Bailey

The english language is constantly changing and evolving. There are words with definitions in the 2010 dictionary that didnt exist before, as well as words who's definition and meaning have changed over generations and editions. The original definition of "decimate" was "to kill one in ten." People use it now to say "destroy," which contradicts the latin prefix of "dec" meaning 10. i.e. "The tornado decimated the area" so, the tornado killed one in ten, hit one in ten houses? How about "that phrase is awful" well, awful use to mean deserving of awe

Laura M Bailey
Laura M Bailey

The english language is constantly changing and evolving. There are words with definitions in the 2010 dictionary that didnt exist before, as well as words who's definition and meaning have changed over generations and editions. The original definition of "decimate" was "to kill one in ten." People use it now to say "destroy," which contradicts the latin prefix of "dec" meaning 10. i.e. "The tornado decimated the area" so, the tornado killed one in ten, hit one in ten houses? How about "that phrase is awful" well, awful use to mean deserving of awe

Clay Morgan
Clay Morgan

Danny, I don't like the phrase myself, and you illustrated why in your post. Meriam Webster defines hate as: intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury b : extreme dislike or antipathy : loathing. Given that definition, is it fair to call me a "hater" because I'm not a fan of Lady Gaga? Or in the context of hate crimes, is it fair to call me a "hater" because I dislike lima beans? Of course it is a silly comparison, but "hate" is another word that has been commandeered, likely because it sounds "cool." However, I doubt those that throw it around so casually give any thought to the actual meaning of the word or implications of real-life hate. My point? Words still matter to some of us and as I explained to my youngest niece once, hate and dislike are not synonymous.

Clay Morgan
Clay Morgan

Danny, I don't like the phrase myself, and you illustrated why in your post. Meriam Webster defines hate as: intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury b : extreme dislike or antipathy : loathing. Given that definition, is it fair to call me a "hater" because I'm not a fan of Lady Gaga? Or in the context of hate crimes, is it fair to call me a "hater" because I dislike lima beans? Of course it is a silly comparison, but "hate" is another word that has been commandeered, likely because it sounds "cool." However, I doubt those that throw it around so casually give any thought to the actual meaning of the word or implications of real-life hate. My point? Words still matter to some of us and as I explained to my youngest niece once, hate and dislike are not synonymous.

Laura M Bailey
Laura M Bailey

Well Danny, haters gonna hate.... no matter how the phrase is used :P

Laura M Bailey
Laura M Bailey

Well Danny, haters gonna hate.... no matter how the phrase is used :P

Kenny Rose
Kenny Rose

Danny

Okay. What I dislike about you is you post too bloody much blog posts within a short space of time.I can't get my timing down yet to make sure I don't forget to visit this blog on a daily basis.

You kicked it in the teeth again no violently with your feather slippers. Lame excuse for real. Haters Gonna Hate. Reminds me of the OG Symbol you get on Klout if you were an early adopter. I am not of course cough, cough :)

Feedback is absolutely uncomfortable if you don't know yourself.

Clearly important for that feedback to be given/received in an appropriate and respectful manner. But it is the most underrated aspect of improving. Too many people tell us what we want to hear. And we can't grow as people, businesses or in a world that is closed to valid, challenge.

As an ex - government economic adviser/employee this was a constant reasons why politicians and senior managers got so much wrong. In that environment people were just blinded by the overarching fact they just wanted to keep their jobs. And to a point I understood it. I never had a problem telling them my views and challenging behavior. I got burned a few times because I was out of order. But I won a few too. Most important was the feedback I received from the people who were on point. That helped me grow and become better and for that I am truly grateful.

Haters Gonna Hate. Your are right. Overused cliche that has no relevance to our reality. We live in prosperous, fabulous places and become too complacent.

Kudos Triple Hat Tip for bringing the word. Danny

Kenny Rose
Kenny Rose

Danny

Okay. What I dislike about you is you post too bloody much blog posts within a short space of time.I can't get my timing down yet to make sure I don't forget to visit this blog on a daily basis.

You kicked it in the teeth again no violently with your feather slippers. Lame excuse for real. Haters Gonna Hate. Reminds me of the OG Symbol you get on Klout if you were an early adopter. I am not of course cough, cough :)

Feedback is absolutely uncomfortable if you don't know yourself.

Clearly important for that feedback to be given/received in an appropriate and respectful manner. But it is the most underrated aspect of improving. Too many people tell us what we want to hear. And we can't grow as people, businesses or in a world that is closed to valid, challenge.

As an ex - government economic adviser/employee this was a constant reasons why politicians and senior managers got so much wrong. In that environment people were just blinded by the overarching fact they just wanted to keep their jobs. And to a point I understood it. I never had a problem telling them my views and challenging behavior. I got burned a few times because I was out of order. But I won a few too. Most important was the feedback I received from the people who were on point. That helped me grow and become better and for that I am truly grateful.

Haters Gonna Hate. Your are right. Overused cliche that has no relevance to our reality. We live in prosperous, fabulous places and become too complacent.

Kudos Triple Hat Tip for bringing the word. Danny

Kenny Rose
Kenny Rose

Danny Okay. What I dislike about you is you post too bloody much blog posts within a short space of time.I can't get my timing down yet to make sure I don't forget to visit this blog on a daily basis. You kicked it in the teeth again no violently with your feather slippers. Lame excuse for real. Haters Gonna Hate. Reminds me of the OG Symbol you get on Klout if you were an early adopter. I am not of course cough, cough :) Feedback is absolutely uncomfortable if you don't know yourself. Clearly important for that feedback to be given/received in an appropriate and respectful manner. But it is the most underrated aspect of improving. Too many people tell us what we want to hear. And we can't grow as people, businesses or in a world that is closed to valid, challenge. As an ex - government economic adviser/employee this was a constant reasons why politicians and senior managers got so much wrong. In that environment people were just blinded by the overarching fact they just wanted to keep their jobs. And to a point I understood it. I never had a problem telling them my views and challenging behavior. I got burned a few times because I was out of order. But I won a few too. Most important was the feedback I received from the people who were on point. That helped me grow and become better and for that I am truly grateful. Haters Gonna Hate. Your are right. Overused cliche that has no relevance to our reality. We live in prosperous, fabulous places and become too complacent. Kudos Triple Hat Tip for bringing the word. Danny

MadMike
MadMike

By the way Danny, many haters don't have any argues to become a "good" hater, and, without a good reason that i insult you, you're nod called an hater, maybe an idiot.

MadMike
MadMike

By the way Danny, many haters don't have any argues to become a "good" hater, and, without a good reason that i insult you, you're nod called an hater, maybe an idiot.

Ana | Traffic Generation
Ana | Traffic Generation

There's nothing wrong with healthy debate - it can be a lot of fun. The problem is when people start calling the other names, just because they have a different point of view.That's just stupid!

Nice post, Danny. Love the spirit in the comments. :-)

Ana | Traffic Generation
Ana | Traffic Generation

There's nothing wrong with healthy debate - it can be a lot of fun. The problem is when people start calling the other names, just because they have a different point of view.That's just stupid!

Nice post, Danny. Love the spirit in the comments. :-)

Ana | Traffic Generation
Ana | Traffic Generation

There's nothing wrong with healthy debate - it can be a lot of fun. The problem is when people start calling the other names, just because they have a different point of view.That's just stupid! Nice post, Danny. Love the spirit in the comments. :-)

Bruce Aristeo
Bruce Aristeo

Danny,

I love it Brother! in studying human behavior, there is always one things that rings true. If a person recognizes something about another person, then the recognizer has that thing which was recognized. For those who don't get what I'm saying... If you see that someone is a liar, then you are also a liar. You can not know that which you don't understand.

To use the example given: If you say "Well, I don't lie!", then know this... Choosing not to act out a behavior is knowing that behavior well enough not to act on it. Have fun with that!
Bruce

Bruce Aristeo
Bruce Aristeo

Danny, I love it Brother! in studying human behavior, there is always one things that rings true. If a person recognizes something about another person, then the recognizer has that thing which was recognized. For those who don't get what I'm saying... If you see that someone is a liar, then you are also a liar. You can not know that which you don't understand. To use the example given: If you say "Well, I don't lie!", then know this... Choosing not to act out a behavior is knowing that behavior well enough not to act on it. Have fun with that! Bruce

John
John

That's right. It's ok to have opinions about things, but haters are just haters. Their opinions are not very objective (yeah i know opinions are subjective but still...), they just find arguments to hate something because...they are haters.
The drawing illustrates that very well.

John
John

That's right. It's ok to have opinions about things, but haters are just haters. Their opinions are not very objective (yeah i know opinions are subjective but still...), they just find arguments to hate something because...they are haters.
The drawing illustrates that very well.

John
John

That's right. It's ok to have opinions about things, but haters are just haters. Their opinions are not very objective (yeah i know opinions are subjective but still...), they just find arguments to hate something because...they are haters. The drawing illustrates that very well.

Rick Rice
Rick Rice

Lame Ass Cop Out! I spent an hour today discussing this with a client who wants to either block comments that don't agree or just ignore them. I finally said, if you just want to make a speech with no open Q&A get out of social media. If you're not going to have the entire conversation why be in a conversational media? Publish a book or something.

Isn't the conversation one of the biggest advantages social media has opened up?

Danny
Danny

Haha, you would have detested me a couple of months ago, mate, when I was posting daily - pared it back to about 3-4 a week now. :)

You know, that's an interesting point you make about keeping jobs. I see that as very similar where more people want to speak out on social networks, but fear a backlash from the people they speak out about (because of their popularity), or the sheep that blindly follow these folks.

Yet when was questioning something we have issues with wrong? I dunno, mate - some people. ;-)

Danny
Danny

Haha, you would have detested me a couple of months ago, mate, when I was posting daily - pared it back to about 3-4 a week now. :) You know, that's an interesting point you make about keeping jobs. I see that as very similar where more people want to speak out on social networks, but fear a backlash from the people they speak out about (because of their popularity), or the sheep that blindly follow these folks. Yet when was questioning something we have issues with wrong? I dunno, mate - some people. ;-)

Danny
Danny

And the worst offenders? The blogger's that allow their readers to come out with this crap. Ah well. ;-)

Danny
Danny

And the worst offenders? The blogger's that allow their readers to come out with this crap. Ah well. ;-)

Danny
Danny

"You can not know that which you don’t understand."

Damn, Bruce, when you put it like that, mate, you wonder why so many miss that one simple point. Ignorance is truly bliss, I guess. ;-)

Cheers, mate!

Danny
Danny

"You can not know that which you don’t understand." Damn, Bruce, when you put it like that, mate, you wonder why so many miss that one simple point. Ignorance is truly bliss, I guess. ;-) Cheers, mate!

Danny
Danny

Thing is, you can be subjective while raising actual objections and still be classed a hater. Fun times. ;-)

Danny
Danny

Thing is, you can be subjective while raising actual objections and still be classed a hater. Fun times. ;-)

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