“Haters Gonna Hate” Or A Lame Assed Cop Out?

“Haters Gonna Hate” Or A Lame Assed Cop Out?

Opinions are great. They allow people to share their thoughts on something, and contribute to a conversation that otherwise may have passed them by.

Opposing opinions are even better, as they stop us from becoming too ego-centric and full of our own bunkum. Opposing opinions can make us re-evaluate our viewpoints with fact and make us better people for learning new ideas.

Of course, the problem with having opposing opinions to something is that, often, the people you’re questioning don’t like it. So they get snarky. Or, if that person’s a blogger, their adoring fans respond to your comment with a “Haters gonna hate” reply.

Seriously, what the f*ck does that have to do with anything?

Because someone doesn’t have their nose up your demigod’s ass too, all of a sudden that makes them a hater? Get real.

You want hate? Try being gay in Jamaica. Or try being ethnic in some parts of Canada. Or try being a woman in Afghanistan. Or try expressing your civil rights in Equatorial Guinea.

That’s hate, right there. Where your life is about as valued as dog crap. The people living in these places and experiencing that hate every day would laugh in your face if you said an opinion on a blog post, or an online thought, meant you were a hater.

The sad thing is, it’s becoming more common to use the “haters gonna hate” excuse for countering a different opinion. I’ve seen social media leaders use it, or not do anything to discourage it in their readers, and I’ve seen people use it more when someone expresses a valid opinion or counter-point.

Here’s the thing though – the “haters gonna hate” exuse? It’s just a lame cop out by people that have usually been called out on crap, and have nothing valid to respond with. It means your ass has been handed to you, and all you can come up with is the person that just handed you your ass is obviously a hater.

Trouble is, others see that you’ve been called out too with a valid counterpoint. And coming back with a “haters gonna hate” soundbite just makes you look as lame as the term itself.

Especially when you put it into context alongside real hate in the world…

image: kenfagerdotcom

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Comments

  1. says

    I think that, if used properly, it does have merit if it’s said another way.

    “Critics are going to be critics.”

    As a writer, you have to get over the fact that you’re going to be criticized and keep writing. I think that this is the intended message of the saying. Although, as you pointed out, it often morphs into something else entirely.

    “Haters gonna hate” is just another form of it. However, it often replaces actual dialogue and that is a detriment. But if not this saying, then it will be another. People are going to be defensive of themselves and of people or things that they like.

    They’ll do this to their own detriment.

    It’s irritating beyond belief for the one who commenter who managed to point something out, but if that’s the way it is there, then you’re better off leaving anyway.

    • says

      Thing is, Shad, criticism helps you grow (if it’s constructive, and sometimes even when it’s not). Hate just holds you back.

      Maybe the “haters gonna hate” brigade just need to grow a thicker skin… πŸ˜‰

      PS – AWESOME blog post title!

      • says

        Oh, I agree wholeheartedly. I just don’t see the use of it ever diminishing. It is one of those characteristics of a blog that determines whether it will fail or succeed.

        (Note: I can see hate inspiring you to do more, but that’s a psychology lesson for another day).

        Thank you!

      • Greg says

        Excellent post, thank you! I never understood what ‘Haters gonna hate’ exactly means, probably because it means nothing. It’s the laziest and dumbest way of saying ‘Some people might not agree with my opinion’. It’s horrible and should be banned.

  2. says

    Haters gonna hate. ;P

    I totally know where you’re coming from, Danny. It’s a shame some people take that sentiment literally. True, there are people out there so miserable in their own inadequacies as to hate on others (as if that, in any way, makes them right or improves their situations), and those people should receive less of our attention once attempts to help them are exhausted, but this is no reason to hastily write off opportunities for vanity’s sake.

    To that end, every time I see someone say “Haters gonna hate,” I’m reminded of the movie Idiocracy (which everyone should watch at least twice, by the way) and respond with “Baters gonna ‘bate.” :)

  3. says

    I’m a big fan of professional discourse and debate because that’s the only thing that makes you open your mind and think about things differently. Being a blogger is a HUGE ego stroke because all of your readers tell you how much they love you every day. Which I love. But man do I love it when someone will debate me. Tell me I’m thinking about something too narrowly and provide proof of such. That’s where the real magic happens. So the people who says haters gonna hate? Maybe you should try listening to what they have to say.

    • says

      I can’t recall which post it was, Gini, but someone debated the crap outta it with me in an email exchange. And you know what? They were right.

      If people are so close-minded (or thin-skinned) that they need to come out passive-aggressive-defensive when someone disagrees, they might have bigger things to worry about than a different point of view…

      • says

        I love that…”and they were right.” Kind of like my jeans post. I said you should never, ever wear jeans on stage. And a lot of people debated me on it, saying it depends on the audience. I still wouldn’t wear jeans on stage, but I now agree there are certain occasions where they work.

        • says

          I just want to serve you all a drink and share “perspectives” with our feet up on a porch railing.

          I love this post, Danny. When we deflect a different opinion as crap, or hate, or stupid, we lose the opportunity to stretch our brains. And when we attach such broad labels to anyone who thinks differently–“liberal” “conservative” “hater” “cop out”–we prove we’ve stopped listening and lack the capacity to understand. And that’s a pity.

  4. says

    I think this points to that buzz word.. yea that one.. authenticity. Responding to instead of pushing it off as “haters gonna hate” is the authentic thing to do. It’s real stuff. This is real talk. These are big boy (and girl ;)) channels.

    Debates are great, provided people aren’t disrespecting the crap out of others.

    I’m #withit

  5. says

    Any terms that does more to distract from conversation than add to it have to go. Haters is a good one, can think of plenty of others as well… kind of sad to see that so many of us working in communications suck so badly at communicating…

    Nicely done on adding context to what the words really mean, a good and important reminder…

  6. says

    Yeah, you nailed it with the words “cop out.” All of these terms like “haters gonna hate” or accusing people of flaming (when they are just disagreeing) are just mildly disguised ad hominem arguments — attacking the arguer instead of the argument.

    Funny timing for me, I just finally posted a comment policy on my blog a few hours ago. Perhaps I should go back and add “Refuting any argument with the expression haters gonna hate” to the list of inappropriate comments. :)

    Good post Danny. Needed to be said.

  7. says

    Danny – I completely agree with your sentiment of opposing view points being of value to both the writer and the audience. Sometimes a writer needs to be critical to engender discussion and encourage counter points.
    But I also agree that a “hater’s gonna hate” is indicative of a person who has either tired of or run out of ways to support their argument. Its essentially an ad hominem response. There are ways to be critical without being personal – I’ve seen you do it and do it well. What would solve this issue is if we could support one another when we admit we’re wrong. Now THAT would take the hate right out of the haters.

    • says

      Your closing sentiment, Tara – support one another when we admit we’re wrong – is the gold right there. Now for us all to work on that. :)

  8. says

    Erm…*raises hand*

    I saw that comment and kind of scratched my head. However, if you only ever comment to disagree with a blogger, your response becomes just as expected as the people who say, “Oh. My. God. Becky. Look at that blog post. Look at how awesome it is!”

    There are a lot of dynamics in the Blogosphere and on Twitter where it seems like the main purpose of contact is to disagree, potentially start heated debates, get everybody jumbled up, and then say, “Man, that dude sucks.” On both sides.I always am puzzled why anyone bothers. Just leave the person alone and do your own great stuff.

    As a perpetual spectator to these kinds of things I have to say it doesn’t really come across as civil discourse. It’s more like picking…and it makes ALL parties involved look bad. If those debates were on occasion balanced by mad props or actual conversation, I think it would look differently all the way around.

    Of course, as Levar Burton says, you don’t have to take my word for it (doo de doo!) I’m still pretty new ’round these parts. I just like your posts that are not about this kind of stuff better :) I find that spending time on this kind of dynamic takes you off the really supreme gift you have for pointing out the positive and the big picture.

    *puts hand down*

    • says

      Hey there miss,

      You can raise your hand any time. :)

      I know what you’re saying, and I’ll be the first to admit I give certain bloggers a hard time when they completely contradict all they’ve preached for the last X amount of years (though I often counter it with praise for a great post).

      I do that because I expect better from them, and feel they’re short-changing their readers. And often, much of what they say doesn’t have real grounding with business acumen or strategy, and can be dangerous thinking to those that are blindly following that advice.

      Lately, though, I’ll leave them to it, because I have far better people to read and comment on. :)

      As for “this kind of dynamic”, I can only writes what feels (insert Popeye impression here). :)

      • says

        Maybe that’s what we should do! On Twitter there should be a “raise hand” feature like in GoToMeeting!:) That would rock.

        I understand what you’re saying – you have a much longer relationship with the folks you talk to, so I can’t speak to your exact perspective. I just think your best posts are the ones where you show people that you can actually be positive in the online world :)

        Also, I would posit that readers are getting more savvy when it comes to smelling doo. If a blogger is taking folks for a ride, they’ll hear about it. No nudging necessary :)

    • says

      Margie has it. There’s a distinction here and we may be debating over its now diluted usage as opposed to what it was originally used in response to.

      It used to be a way of dismissing the perpetual trolls and Debbie downers that Margie suggests (and that we see everywhere, even offline – the people who will find something wrong with everything you do, no matter what you do, even if it is what they wanted, much like working customer service in a retail setting). It was a phrase “haters gonna hate” issued like a sigh, in response to those thorns in our sides who aren’t ever constructive, because everyone knew that nothing good would ever come about with dealing with that person let alone debating them (don’t feed the trolls).

      Unfortunately, that phrase, like many others in the English language, has been bastardized, diluted, and whatnot; and as such is now being applied by some people in response to any sort of negative feedback as a wholesale dismissal (love me or leave kind of philosophy). There are some very major brands right now (both online and off) that employ this philosophy (and several of their high profile charges strut around on stage proud of the fact that they do this).

      And that’s the distinction – I think what this post is geared towards (and which it seems that Margie is also making mention of) is this second group of people who are telling their communities to love it or leave by dismissing any feedback (constructive or not) with the haters gonna hate phrase (rather than dismissing the insatiable people who only nitpick).

  9. says

    Nice Danny.

    Without opposing viewpoints, this world would be boring.

    I almost loathe the ‘yes…I agree’ comment about as much as the ‘haters gonna hate’ comment. Tell me why you agree or disagree with me :)

    If you don’t agree with me, but tell me why you disagree and I’ll do the same. Lets discuss, debate and disagree….that’s whats fun about the world of blogging.

  10. says

    Hate is a big word Danny.
    I think people use it a bit too easily. The examples you give of people experiencing hate is right on. Disagreeing nicely in an online forum is hardly hate.

    This reminds me of the story about Galliano and his anti-semitic rant. He got struck down under French law for ‘hate speech’. There are laws here which will land you in jail if you incite hatred towards a minority. It’s a serious matter which has led millions to their death in Europe over the centuries.

    Now back to online, disagreeing with someone and presenting a new approach to something isn’t hate. Period.

    People need to learn what hates means, your examples should help with that.

    • says

      I saw that news piece about Galliano. Guy’s an idiot. I know he mentioned he’s having drink and drug abuse problems, but I know a lot of people that have suffered the same and never felt the need to come out with that crap.

    • says

      Great analogy, Ann Marie – part of me thinks the ease in which you can “build yourself up” online has led to a lot of people taking the “fame” too seriously, and wondering how dare people question their ideas. Ah well…

  11. says

    we must not hate, get rid of the words hate,
    even though we disagree in the debate, or in a communication do not show a sense of hate you for difference of opinion. if you hate going to bother you sendiri.so open mind to accept differences of opinion in order to form a good deal

  12. says

    Hi, Eric, I agree it is very pleasant to communicate in the blogosphere, sometimes feel the hatred arise in the comments, but it’s a natural thing. setipa humans have a sense of emotions and different opinions, what do you think?

  13. says

    Hi, Danny.

    As a person who loves smiling and making friends, I just can’t understand why there are people who get driven by that HATE word. I see no sense in it. Why do they need to be haters? Why do they hate?

    There are so many good things in the world to stop people from hating, no matter how difficult their circumstance. If only these people will see that there are ten good things to one of the things they hate, the world would definitely be a better place.

    • says

      Ironically enough, Kim, I often find those that could be forgiven for hating – like the victims in the examples I use – often use it as a spur instead to improve their lives and not to let themselves be driven down by real hate.

      Go figure… πŸ˜‰

  14. says

    I can’t help but get the feeling that this post was inspired by my recent comments sectons, which has that exact ttitle.

    So, from now on, all of my comments are lame assed cop outs, And I’m ok with that.

  15. says

    The biggest issue I see is people dropping negative comments just to to stir up shit and hope their name gets a few big mentions during the dust up. Many people comment just for argument’s sake, they really have nothing to contribute.

    Haters are a necessary component though. Without them, you have no one to engage the evangelists. You lose site of who your real friends are. Your ability to deal with criticism fades, and next thing you know, your shit don’t stink anymore.

    Haters can keep you grounded, if their criticism is something you can learn from. Tunnel vision and horse blinders will only allow us to see one point of view. Avoidance will do even more damage.

    I once wrote a post on the 20/30/30/20 rule that included why you need haters. But dropping that link would be baiting and would feel like pandering for readers. πŸ˜‰

    • says

      Are haters necessary, though, or critics, mate? I think there are similarities, but a big singular difference. Though I agree, growth is impossible with constructive criticism and questioning. :)

  16. says

    People like easy, people like to think they don’t need to change evolve. Saying “haters gonna hate” is a nice way to let them stay in their fantasy world that they do no wrong.

    We all need opinions.. constructive opinions help you be better at what you do.

    Any athlete that wants to seriously become a pro. will always choose to train with a Pro player or team rather then people beside or below them…Why?

    They know training with people who are better will get them the criticism, opinions, training they need to be better.

    • says

      Amen to that, John. Those that surround themselves with better and smarter people – who ask and challenge – wil always be ahead of the Yes brigade. :)

      • says

        Exactly… I used to be a pool shark lol semi semi pro player. and I always played people that were better then me 10 fold..I lost 99.99% the time… but it made me better.. much better.

        You are who you hang with.

  17. says

    Hey Danny! This one cracks me up because the Utopian view of the Internet is that we can all get along. Unfortunately, reality has reared its ugly head and just showed that people go with the herd mentality because they can’t handle being an individual. You see, being an individual means you can put up with other points of view because you are asking for others to do the same for you.

    People are sheep. I include myself in this assessment as well. It’s when the sheep won’t allow a different type of sheep in the flock is where we all get sideways. That’s too bad but that’s humanity.

    So I am ready for anyone to tell me to get the flock out! It’s how we express being an individual, right?

    • says

      Haha, funny you mention sheep, mate – check the CommentLuv link. πŸ˜‰

      It’s true, though – those making the biggest strides are the ones taking a stand individually, but listening to the collective to keep things on the straight and narrow.

      The rest, though? Meh… πŸ˜‰

  18. says

    Another intense conversation Danny. You know, a month or so ago you said your blog was going to change directions. I didn’t obviously know what that direction was then, but I’m really starting to see it now, and it’s inspiring my friend.

    Marcus

  19. says

    Well hell – you are always good for a slap in the face first thing in the mornin’ Mr. brown!

    I’ve used the term. Honestly, I felt weird using it. I’m thinking it because it was really a cop out.

    There is truth in the fact that if I use it – I teach the people around me (especially on my blog)that it is okay to simply sling it around in response to criticism.

    Monkey balls.

  20. Al Pittampalli says

    This is an important post. Haters gonnna hate was a reaction to trolls who don’t engage in civil reasonable debate. But the majority of us good guys do. It’s so important not to mix the too, otherwise we create a culture of groupthink…which is a terrible terrible fate.

    • says

      And you know, you can always just ignore the trolls, Al. Using haters gonna hate just sees you join the Troll Club, as far as I can see… πŸ˜‰

  21. says

    Kinda like being Persian during the hostage crisis, too, as I can attest to first hand. A-list brings on haters? Is that true? Does envy turn to a toppling mentality? Thankfully, I’ve not experienced this aspect of blogging; hope I don’t. Ever.

    • says

      And there you have it, miss – perspective.

      Not sure if A-list bring on haters any more than someone that offers a viewpoint in public – but they sure do seem to snap a lot more… πŸ˜‰

  22. says

    It’s a copout, an excuse to not even try to consider the other side. Hate is something else, as John said that word gets misused. A healthy, productive online debate is not hate. Chris, Margie, Gini, Bruce all have it right that there will be opposing views, that’s part of the Internets.. and one of the good things about being part of an online community IMO, you actually learn different things. That is if you’re about the conversation like Ann Marie, talking with others rather than just yelling at them. Maybe you will end up ‘agreeing to disagree’ but hopefully everyone will benefit from the discussion. John Paul nailed it with his ‘fantasy world’ comment. I’ve seen a lot of that in forums and news comments; your Apple cartoon a perfect example. This is what happens when I comment late, I just end up reading the comments.. have nothing new to add. FWIW.

  23. says

    Very good point well made. It is all too easy of a cop out and you see it all the time on the big blogs. Worse still is the stories where the bloggers start making themselves more of the story and am seeing that a lot these days. Disagree in any way and you are a hater!

      • says

        I was there working in microcredit, doing product development and industry marketing. Everyone in Afghanistan was a survivor – those who didn’t were dead – and everyone had a story. I worked mainly with Afghan women. One, I remember, had seen twenty some family members executed outside her home by the Taliban. She and her husband was spared because he was an invalid. She packed up her family and fled to Pakistan, where they lived as a refugee for roughly ten years. After the Americans came, they returned to Kabul. She got a $100 loan and started sewing, and eventually parlayed it into a company that employed 25 Afghan women making bedding, and a tailor shop for her sons in law. With all she’d gone through (and continued to go through – it’s dangerous for women go about on the streets much less run a business) she kept going. The property laws in Afghanistan were a mess when I was there and I presume still are – women couldn’t own property so I’m not certain how she accomplished it. If you can’t own property, and you can be killed with impunity for stepping out of line (e.g. honor killings), what are you but property? Sometimes I felt the cattle got more respect.

  24. says

    Lame Ass Cop Out! I spent an hour today discussing this with a client who wants to either block comments that don’t agree or just ignore them. I finally said, if you just want to make a speech with no open Q&A get out of social media. If you’re not going to have the entire conversation why be in a conversational media? Publish a book or something.

    Isn’t the conversation one of the biggest advantages social media has opened up?

    • says

      Here’s the funny thing about that example, Rick.

      Say you’re on a round of golf with two big players in the local business market. You chat, you think your jokes, criticism, bad-mouthing, etc, is part of a private conversation.

      Then your golfing partners start talking to their friends about what you said – in supposed private and now your business name is mud and you’re screwed locally.

      Now, is that any different from offering a viewpoint on a blog comment section or via Twitter? πŸ˜‰

      Shit’s going to happen, and you just need to man up and deal with it if you want to put your thoughts out there in the first place…

  25. says

    That’s right. It’s ok to have opinions about things, but haters are just haters. Their opinions are not very objective (yeah i know opinions are subjective but still…), they just find arguments to hate something because…they are haters.
    The drawing illustrates that very well.

  26. says

    Danny,

    I love it Brother! in studying human behavior, there is always one things that rings true. If a person recognizes something about another person, then the recognizer has that thing which was recognized. For those who don’t get what I’m saying… If you see that someone is a liar, then you are also a liar. You can not know that which you don’t understand.

    To use the example given: If you say “Well, I don’t lie!”, then know this… Choosing not to act out a behavior is knowing that behavior well enough not to act on it. Have fun with that!
    Bruce

    • says

      “You can not know that which you don’t understand.”

      Damn, Bruce, when you put it like that, mate, you wonder why so many miss that one simple point. Ignorance is truly bliss, I guess. πŸ˜‰

      Cheers, mate!

  27. says

    There’s nothing wrong with healthy debate – it can be a lot of fun. The problem is when people start calling the other names, just because they have a different point of view.That’s just stupid!

    Nice post, Danny. Love the spirit in the comments. :-)

  28. says

    By the way Danny, many haters don’t have any argues to become a “good” hater, and, without a good reason that i insult you, you’re nod called an hater, maybe an idiot.

  29. says

    Danny

    Okay. What I dislike about you is you post too bloody much blog posts within a short space of time.I can’t get my timing down yet to make sure I don’t forget to visit this blog on a daily basis.

    You kicked it in the teeth again no violently with your feather slippers. Lame excuse for real. Haters Gonna Hate. Reminds me of the OG Symbol you get on Klout if you were an early adopter. I am not of course cough, cough :)

    Feedback is absolutely uncomfortable if you don’t know yourself.

    Clearly important for that feedback to be given/received in an appropriate and respectful manner. But it is the most underrated aspect of improving. Too many people tell us what we want to hear. And we can’t grow as people, businesses or in a world that is closed to valid, challenge.

    As an ex – government economic adviser/employee this was a constant reasons why politicians and senior managers got so much wrong. In that environment people were just blinded by the overarching fact they just wanted to keep their jobs. And to a point I understood it. I never had a problem telling them my views and challenging behavior. I got burned a few times because I was out of order. But I won a few too. Most important was the feedback I received from the people who were on point. That helped me grow and become better and for that I am truly grateful.

    Haters Gonna Hate. Your are right. Overused cliche that has no relevance to our reality. We live in prosperous, fabulous places and become too complacent.

    Kudos Triple Hat Tip for bringing the word. Danny

    • says

      Haha, you would have detested me a couple of months ago, mate, when I was posting daily – pared it back to about 3-4 a week now. :)

      You know, that’s an interesting point you make about keeping jobs. I see that as very similar where more people want to speak out on social networks, but fear a backlash from the people they speak out about (because of their popularity), or the sheep that blindly follow these folks.

      Yet when was questioning something we have issues with wrong? I dunno, mate – some people. πŸ˜‰

  30. Clay Morgan says

    Danny, I don’t like the phrase myself, and you illustrated why in your post. Meriam Webster defines hate as: intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury b : extreme dislike or antipathy : loathing. Given that definition, is it fair to call me a “hater” because I’m not a fan of Lady Gaga? Or in the context of hate crimes, is it fair to call me a “hater” because I dislike lima beans? Of course it is a silly comparison, but “hate” is another word that has been commandeered, likely because it sounds “cool.” However, I doubt those that throw it around so casually give any thought to the actual meaning of the word or implications of real-life hate. My point? Words still matter to some of us and as I explained to my youngest niece once, hate and dislike are not synonymous.

  31. Laura M Bailey says

    The english language is constantly changing and evolving. There are words with definitions in the 2010 dictionary that didnt exist before, as well as words who’s definition and meaning have changed over generations and editions. The original definition of “decimate” was “to kill one in ten.” People use it now to say “destroy,” which contradicts the latin prefix of “dec” meaning 10. i.e. “The tornado decimated the area” so, the tornado killed one in ten, hit one in ten houses? How about “that phrase is awful” well, awful use to mean deserving of awe

  32. Danny Brown says

    True, Laura – though I’m not sure there will ever be a change in the perception of what “hate” means πŸ˜‰

  33. Laura M Bailey says

    lol we’ll see. Buxom use to mean obediant and now means full-figured or large breasted… so we’ll see about hate. Maybe we can start a change hate movement?

  34. Mike Ashworth says

    I wonder if the boundaries shifted? Things that used to merely tick ppl off now become hate. Maybe because saying ‘so and so really ticks me off’ sounds a bit lame and of course its so easy to join the baying “hate this fail that” of the keyboard warriors. Just one problem though. when you say you hate something that actually isn’t that dire where does this leave someone to go for things that are really terrible? HATE in caps maybe? Loads of !!!!!!!!!! Or perhaps it actually increases their inner rage and like a pressure cooker, the anger increases until one day it explodes, in road rage, or they assault someone over some seemingly innocuous event, I’ve seen it happen. Or maybe they just end up hating themselves.

  35. Danny Brown says

    Haha, awesome comment, Mike :)

    I just think it’s a lazy way out of trying to defend a position – you know you’ve either been caught out, or someone’s said a really valid point, and to save face, you automatically call someone a “hater”. Meh.

  36. Mike Ashworth says

    It is lazy. ppl are unable to reason and 140 characters makes that nigh on impossible. It’s like watching a teenager who hasn’t developed the vocabulary to have a reasoned discussion swear at the other person or lash out physically.

  37. Chris Dennis says

    I have never heard it used to defend a position but, rather to comment on someone being stupid…an alternate phrase to mean …’assholes will be assholes’….I’ve learned that I need to look for the intend of the speaker and not focus so hard on the dictionary version of words…keeps me off the soap boxes….

  38. Donna Lehman says

    Rates up there with ‘It is what it is’, when someone wants to shrug off an unpleasant situation or choice. It’s non-active. Dialogue and options are always possible – popular or not. I don’t feel we should ever sound complacent or accepting of ‘hate’ speech/actions. Agree with Mike though that it’s over used hyperbole in many cases. ‘Aggravated by’, ‘annoyed’, ‘irritated’ are more often expressed as ‘I hate this or that’. Glad you raised the question Danny.

  39. Danny Brown says

    Chris – fair point. Though when it’s the sole retort, you can’t really look for the intend of the speaker. Besides, there are better phrases to use than “hate” which has far different connotations, regardless of the intent. πŸ˜‰

  40. says

    I really do loathe when a person’s following starts bullying a person for having a difference of opinion. Have to love Mob Mentality I suppose…Β 
    There is too much real hate going on in the world – You could add how women are treated in India to the list. Or the issues going on in the Ukraine, Or the seeming never ending issues with Israel and Palestine..Β 
    Why do people hate change? Or want to live in so much fear they hide it with hate? Look at Gay Marriage, Legalizing Marijuana, or President Obama. Those three things alone produce way more hate then they should.Β 

    Haters Gonna Hate – Unfortunately if you look at it literally and not in the context it’s being used by people on the internet? Its truth wrapped up in three words. Humanity seems to thrive on having to hate something. Which is unfortunate.Β 

    I wish I had an answer.

  41. says

    avgjoegeek So true, mate. It’s an ever-present, sadly. One conflict recedes / ends, another one begins, and a new cycle of hate comes into play. The shit I’m seeing on Facebook about Obama is disgusting, and appals me.Β 
    I guess that’s what happens when you give idiots the volume of social media and the anonymity of a keyboard….

  42. elDragonata says

    In my view, being termed a ‘hater’ for expressing an opposing view falls in the same camp as being labelled ‘negative’, ‘judgemental’ or ‘jealous’ for the same things. Ultimately, these responses are not only misconstrued and misconceived but also potentially arrogant for they imply that the other person somehow knows you personally (i.e. about your character and temperament) to reach such a conclusion. This, evidently, is false, as usually that person doesn’t even know you. Also, it further hints at the discomfort that other person feels in the face of others who are (intellectually and behaviourally) assured, poised and honest.

    In the early days of encountering such people, I used to be ‘bothered’ by it but nowadays, I simply laugh inwardly. It’s a very obtuse, weak and ultimately stupid way to handle a differing opinion. At the end of the day as well, I can be comfortable knowing that it’s not my knowledge or awareness of my world that’s stunted in that respect.

  43. says

    elDragonata I love your attitude of just laughing it away. For me, that’s the best response to them. They thrive on conflict and getting under peoples’ skin. Take that away from them, they have nothing.
    Thanks for such a thoughtful comment. :)