The Social Media Pedestal

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social media pedestalsThis is a guest post by Bill Dorman.

Okay, I was going to jokingly say Michelangelo must have had me in mind when he sculpted this; but then that might imply I’m old and my FedEx package could have been sent via regular mail instead of shipped. Now we wouldn’t want that as a persona, would we?

Throughout your life, somebody somewhere is always looking up to you; and sometimes it can create lofty expectations. Do you want to be there? Is it deserved? What responsibilities come with that?

This post is a reflection of the admirations and criticisms that occur in the social media world.

What are you trying to achieve?

You got into the blogosphere for a reason. Everybody has their own reason but I’m guessing it wasn’t to be a lump and just sit around without exploring or growing, right?

It appears most are hoping to monetize in some way whether directly through their site, or one-off in selling their knowledge or services.

Guess what, to do this you have to expand and grow your network, build your community as they  say. The more you are involved in growing your network, the more visible you become.

I think they like me

Most of the time it is a virtual love-fest in the comment section of blogs. Everybody is gushing how great the article is, how great the author is, how their breath can’t possibly stink, etc. Typically, everyone only sees the ‘good’ you. Can you see how easy it would be for an outsider to assume your community has placed you on this pedestal? Maybe you even start to believe the hype; did you just breathe into your hand to check your breath?

My wife reads my blog from time to time and jokes about how much everyone seems to adore me and all the back and forth thanking that goes on. She said, “Yeah, let them live with you for 30 days and see how great they think you are.”  I’m sure she says it in jest,  but I do see her point.

Don’t get me wrong however, I like the compliments. For some this is the only payment received, so of course they like it; it’s validation. However, it’s only healthy to keep it in perspective and stay as grounded as you can.

Lofty height indeed

As you progress up the ladder, based on whatever measurement of success you are using, you put yourself out there for all the world to see. Your comments, strategy, your whole demeanor is subject to review, criticism and debate.

You do have to develop a thick skin, but do you think it also changes who you are? Does it matter?

Make no mistake, all things are not created equal and there are different rungs on this ladder. This hierarchy is real and to say otherwise would be naive.

You do seem different

Typically success increases your activity; and this requires more time. Because of this, the way you interact now can look different than it did when you started. This doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve changed per se, but you did change. Some people will resent your success and could be jealous; not everyone will be happy for you to succeed.

Is this the least of your worries?

You can liken it to the corporate world where you have a group of buddies (equals) who hang out together and one of them gets promoted to manager. Suddenly the dynamics of the relationship just changed, and it is different.

It’s still just me

People who want to be successful tend to be competitive. Success can bring recognition and sometimes it might appear you are on a pedestal for all to see. Leaders frequently assume this position.

Whereas success brings more attention, don’t be so quick to build someone up to be something they didn’t ask to be.

Keep that in mind in the way you might challenge someone, until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes. Just because they have had some success shouldn’t make them an open target. It’s all about respect and common decency.

Also remember, once you’ve been placed on a pedestal there is only one way to go. I mean look at that naked dude up there, you don’t think people aren’t laughing at him?
You think you want it, but are you ready for what it entails when you take that ‘step up’?

Bill DormanAbout the author: Bill Dorman is a blogger who enjoys networking and adding value to his relationships. He is an insurance broker by profession. You can find him any day at Bill Dorman, The Invisible Blogger, where all strays are welcome and you can even subscribe to his content. Follow Bill on Twitter at @bdorman264.

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About Danny

Danny Brown is Chief Technologist at ArCompany, helping clients turn social media intelligence into business results. He’s the co-author of Influence Marketing: How to Create, Manage and Measure Brand Influencers in Social Media Marketing, described as "the book that will change the way we do business today." He’s an award-winning marketer whose delivered results for organizations like Microsoft Canada, BlackBerry, FedEx, Ford Canada and LG Electronics, and his blog is recognized as the #1 marketing blog in the world by HubSpot.

362 comments
penneyfox
penneyfox

@bdorman264 Alright War fricken' Eagle ... here's a good one for you: BREAKING NEWS: Georgia Tech football practice delayed two hours after a player reported an unknown white substance on the practice field. The Coach suspended practice while police were called. After an analysis, experts determined that the white substance unknown to Georgia Tech players was the GOAL LINE. Practice was resumed after it was decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again........GO DAWGS (and yes, it would be nice if this was our year but I doubt it)

KDillabough
KDillabough

@newdaynewlesson@DannyBrown And from me too? :)

bdorman264
bdorman264

@DannyBrown You mean we can't just kick it out the back door?

bdorman264
bdorman264

Sorry Dan, I thought we were done..................I forgot to lock the back door..........

bdorman264
bdorman264

Sorry Dan, I thought we were done..................I forgot to lock the back door..........

bdorman264
bdorman264

@newdaynewlesson@Brankica@DannyBrown What would be crazy is to have celebrity or star athlete adoration and you couldn't even go out in public. That would not be any fun at all..... I'd say just be famous/influential enough you can get just about anyone you want on the phone in your home town and can make the ask 'hey, I need you to stroke a check for $10,000 to my favorite charity' and get it done.

bdorman264
bdorman264

@penneyfoxskypulsemedia Ok SEC, I've got 3 words for you Ms Penneyfox - War Damn Eagle...........maybe it's UGA's time this year.

bdorman264
bdorman264

@DannyBrown@newdaynewlesson Hopefully my honorarium will cover the costs and we can just call it a wash.....

newdaynewlesson
newdaynewlesson

@DannyBrown@bdorman264 Fine, I only made a little mess, but I'll chip in. :-)

DannyBrown
DannyBrown

@bdorman264 I think the least you can do is supply the garbage bags after all these shenanigans :)

DannyBrown
DannyBrown

@bdorman264@newdaynewlesson I'm sending you the bill tonight.

newdaynewlesson
newdaynewlesson

@bdorman264@Brankica@DannyBrown I met someone a little while ago who is quite famous here in Israel and I was so struck by the way she was just like everyone else. She was kind of surprised when I remarked on that to her. She laughed and she said she couldn't understand why because she knew she was just like everyone else.

penneyfox
penneyfox

@bdorman264skypulsemedia Just let me know when the conversation opens up about college football! I'm all about the SEC, especially my UGA Bulldogs. 3 weeks to football and counting ....

bdorman264
bdorman264

@newdaynewlesson@Brankica@DannyBrown Danny's got it going on and he's worked very hard to get where he is. But he will be the first to tell you, he's still 'just Danny'. He should be proud of what he has accomplished and never have to apologize for that. He does a very good job of keeping it in perspective and has taken it upon himself to throw me some love for some reason; which was very much appreciated. I'm sure Danny appreciates you hangin' at his place and I can assure you, the conversation can get lively at times. Thanks for taking the time to comment as well; hope your journey has been a good one.

bdorman264
bdorman264

@penneyfox Yep, still going deep but I love it. skypulsemedia helps me interpret this stuff so I don't look silly out here.....but Howie is smart like that. I talk baseball with Howie, that's my depth......:). I do like your comment about enjoying the ride; yes, I think changes occur but it doesn't have to be a negative. Just don't over think it and enjoy it for what it is, no more, no less.

bdorman264
bdorman264

@newdaynewlesson Thank you ma'am, very nice of you to say and thanks for stopping by. Danny throws a heck of a party; better his place than mine though, did you see the mess?

newdaynewlesson
newdaynewlesson like.author.displayName 1 Like

Oh and sorry-forgot to say-I enjoyed the post Bill.

bdorman264
bdorman264 like.author.displayName 1 Like

@newdaynewlesson Thank you ma'am, very nice of you to say and thanks for stopping by. Danny throws a heck of a party; better his place than mine though, did you see the mess?

Danny Brown
Danny Brown moderator like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@bdorman264@newdaynewlesson I'm sending you the bill tonight.

newdaynewlesson
newdaynewlesson

@Brankica@DannyBrown@bdorman264 I agree. While you are a person like the rest of us, there is something unique about you. (Not to mention that I love the look of you blog and that drew me in too, though it was the posts and the community that kept me in) I haven't been reading your blog that long, but have been an avid "fan" from the first post. You have a way with words and with connections and I admire that.

penneyfox
penneyfox

@bdorman264 Not my intention to get all deep and metaphysical-like here ... there was just something about your post that after I read it, I looked up at the quote on my office wall and said, yeah, that's what he's talking about. Once you put yourself out there, something happens within and it leaves us with no where to go but to enjoy the ride. Damn ... did I just go deep again?!?! Sorry about that ... this conversation with everyone in this community just seems to have struck a chord with me since reading your post.

penneyfox
penneyfox

@bdorman264@HowieSPM Not my intention to get all deep and metaphysical-like here ... there was just something about your post that after I read it, I looked up at the quote on my office wall and said, yeah, that's what he's talking about. Once you put yourself out there, something happens within and it leaves us with no where to go but to enjoy the ride. Damn ... did I just go deep again?!?! Sorry about that ... this conversation with everyone in this community just seems to have struck a chord with me since reading your post.

bdorman264
bdorman264

@AllieRambles I know exactly what you are saying; I didn't make up the invisible moniker thinking it was going to be cute. I really expected to be invisible. However, even though it's obvious I am no longer invisible, I still feel like I am in many ways. Part of the reason is that I haven't changed much from where I started. Part of me thinks I should have grown more since the early days, I just don't know what I want to be when I grow up. I have a complex at times as well; just because I've had some popularity does not necessarily mean I'm good and so I struggled somewhat when DB asked me to do a guest post. I think as bloggers we worry about perfection and most of the time we need to just write and let 'er rip. I don't think any one article will make or break us. I like your style and the fact you let me crash your mommy blog; I'm glad I can be a part of your community. I also like your support as well; very, very much appreciated. Hopefully you have the hackers out of your life and back to rock and roll. So good to see you today NoCal.

AllieRambles
AllieRambles like.author.displayName 1 Like

Bill,

@bdorman264

You always put a perspective on things I don't notice at times.

I am not a big blogger but I want to be. But at the same time I still want to almost remain anonymous if it happens. I know this is impossible in my field. I want people to tell me I am doing a great job and thanks for any help BUT I also want to stay true to myself and not feel I need to change to just help them. BUT I want to help them. It feels like a vicious circle at times. I want readers but I get shy when they come. Does that make sense?

Like I said, I'm not big, but I have had people contact me saying thanks for the blogging help. It makes me feel so good that I feel the need to continue and give them even *more* great quality.

What I want, no need, to be sure is that I don't change if (when) I get bigger. That is the original reason people read my blog in the first place. My style and my techniques should stay constant. Some change is good but stay true to myself.

I like your closing statements on successful bloggers. Just because they are up there doesn't make them open targets. This can apply to anyone. They are human and don't deserve to be ripped "a new one" if you don't agree. When I was still new to blogging I had a few negative comments that blew me away. He pretty much blasted my posts. I think he thought it was ok to go after the newbie. I never reacted. And got over it. That is when bloggers need that thick skin.

I always say, and I'm sure everyone agrees, it is ok to comment if you do not agree but do it intelligently. A great blogger will continue the conversation and not let it turn into an argument. Don't forget, it's your blog, if you are being blasted in a negative manner, delete the comment. There is no room for public arguments. If need be do it in private.

As always, great content here on Danny Brown.

~Allie

bdorman264
bdorman264 like.author.displayName 1 Like

@AllieRambles I know exactly what you are saying; I didn't make up the invisible moniker thinking it was going to be cute. I really expected to be invisible. However, even though it's obvious I am no longer invisible, I still feel like I am in many ways. Part of the reason is that I haven't changed much from where I started. Part of me thinks I should have grown more since the early days, I just don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

I have a complex at times as well; just because I've had some popularity does not necessarily mean I'm good and so I struggled somewhat when DB asked me to do a guest post.

I think as bloggers we worry about perfection and most of the time we need to just write and let 'er rip. I don't think any one article will make or break us.

I like your style and the fact you let me crash your mommy blog; I'm glad I can be a part of your community. I also like your support as well; very, very much appreciated.

Hopefully you have the hackers out of your life and back to rock and roll. So good to see you today NoCal.

AllieRambles
AllieRambles

Bill, @bdorman264 You always put a perspective on things I don't notice at times. I am not a big blogger but I want to be. But at the same time I still want to almost remain anonymous if it happens. I know this is impossible in my field. I want people to tell me I am doing a great job and thanks for any help BUT I also want to stay true to myself and not feel I need to change to just help them. BUT I want to help them. It feels like a vicious circle at times. I want readers but I get shy when they come. Does that make sense? Like I said, I'm not big, but I have had people contact me saying thanks for the blogging help. It makes me feel so good that I feel the need to continue and give them even *more* great quality. What I want, no need, to be sure is that I don't change if (when) I get bigger. That is the original reason people read my blog in the first place. My style and my techniques should stay constant. Some change is good but stay true to myself. I like your closing statements on successful bloggers. Just because they are up there doesn't make them open targets. This can apply to anyone. They are human and don't deserve to be ripped "a new one" if you don't agree. When I was still new to blogging I had a few negative comments that blew me away. He pretty much blasted my posts. I think he thought it was ok to go after the newbie. I never reacted. And got over it. That is when bloggers need that thick skin. I always say, and I'm sure everyone agrees, it is ok to comment if you do not agree but do it intelligently. A great blogger will continue the conversation and not let it turn into an argument. Don't forget, it's your blog, if you are being blasted in a negative manner, delete the comment. There is no room for public arguments. If need be do it in private. As always, great content here on Danny Brown. ~Allie

bdorman264
bdorman264

@penneyfox There is some love here, isn't there? It truly amazes me when people show up like this; it certainly helps being in the right house, but this is a lot of my community and I couldn't be lovin' on them any more right now; they make me smile. Give up illusions of containment to the hardest fact of all is that, no matter what the outcome, it is unlikely that you can never again be the person you have been until now. That's somewhat deep but I do like it; normally I would call on @howiespm to interpret, but I get the gist of it. Thanks for taking the time to stop by and weigh in, I hope you are enjoying your journey.

penneyfox
penneyfox like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

Thanks for the honest insight - great to see all the love here.

It made me think about a quote that I have up in my office from a movie that I recently saw:

Accept the enormity.

Give up illusions of containment to the hardest fact of all is that, no matter what the outcome, it is unlikely that you can never again be the person you have been until now.

bdorman264
bdorman264 like.author.displayName 1 Like

@penneyfox There is some love here, isn't there? It truly amazes me when people show up like this; it certainly helps being in the right house, but this is a lot of my community and I couldn't be lovin' on them any more right now; they make me smile.

Give up illusions of containment to the hardest fact of all is that, no matter what the outcome, it is unlikely that you can never again be the person you have been until now. That's somewhat deep but I do like it; normally I would call on @howiespm to interpret, but I get the gist of it.

Thanks for taking the time to stop by and weigh in, I hope you are enjoying your journey.

penneyfox
penneyfox like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@bdorman264

Not my intention to get all deep and metaphysical-like here ... there was just something about your post that after I read it, I looked up at the quote on my office wall and said, yeah, that's what he's talking about. Once you put yourself out there, something happens within and it leaves us with no where to go but to enjoy the ride.

Damn ... did I just go deep again?!?! Sorry about that ... this conversation with everyone in this community just seems to have struck a chord with me since reading your post.

penneyfox
penneyfox like.author.displayName 1 Like

@bdorman264 Alright War fricken' Eagle ... here's a good one for you:

BREAKING NEWS: Georgia Tech football practice delayed two hours after a player reported an unknown white substance on the practice field. The Coach suspended practice while police were called. After an analysis, experts determined that the white substance unknown to Georgia Tech players was the GOAL LINE. Practice was resumed after it was decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again........GO DAWGS (and yes, it would be nice if this was our year but I doubt it)

penneyfox
penneyfox

@bdorman264@skypulsemedia Just let me know when the conversation opens up about college football! I'm all about the SEC, especially my UGA Bulldogs. 3 weeks to football and counting ....

bdorman264
bdorman264 like.author.displayName 1 Like

@penneyfox Yep, still going deep but I love it. @skypulsemedia helps me interpret this stuff so I don't look silly out here.....but Howie is smart like that. I talk baseball with Howie, that's my depth......:).

I do like your comment about enjoying the ride; yes, I think changes occur but it doesn't have to be a negative. Just don't over think it and enjoy it for what it is, no more, no less.

penneyfox
penneyfox

Thanks for the honest insight - great to see all the love here. It made me think about a quote that I have up in my office from a movie that I recently saw: Accept the enormity. Give up illusions of containment to the hardest fact of all is that, no matter what the outcome, it is unlikely that you can never again be the person you have been until now.

bdorman264
bdorman264

@DannyBrown@Brankica I'm pretty sure we would connect whether you had 50 followers or 50,000. You keep it in perspective, very engaging and helpful. I did tell the Barista at Starbucks I knew you and just did a GP but still had to pay full price, so I'm guessing it's still ok to be humble, huh?

DannyBrown
DannyBrown

@bdorman264@Brankica Well I'm glad you feel that way, Bill, honestly. But the pecking order is only what we (as in readers) choose to make it. There are some "A-listers" or "top bloggers" that are anything but, and are living on past glories and only acknowledging the positives said about them. If that's what the top of the pecking order looks like, glad I'm not a part of it (nor would I want to be). ;-)

bdorman264
bdorman264 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

So, this is what it feels like to drive a Ferrari? I guess it's time to clean up this mess; do you have any large garbage bags?

Thank you much sir for the invite; I had a blast and much love to all the people who showed up, it was very much appreciated.

bdorman264
bdorman264

So, this is what it feels like to drive a Ferrari? I guess it's time to clean up this mess; do you have any large garbage bags? Thank you much sir for the invite; I had a blast and much love to all the people who showed up, it was very much appreciated.

bdorman264
bdorman264

@adamtoporek We can use a little 'dust' up; put some contractors back to work and raise the insurance rates, right? Just remember, you can never have too much insurance.............:)

Trackbacks

  1. [...] The Social Media Pedestal originally appeared on Danny Brown | Social Media Marketing Blog – The Human Side of Media and the Social Side of Marketing under a Creative Commons license. [...]

  2. [...] the rest here: The Social Media Pedestal Posted in Blogs, Comentário, Media, TV | Tagged Comentário, Media, people-place, televisão [...]

  3. [...] See more here: The Social Media Pedestal [...]

  4. [...] Read this article: The Social Media Pedestal [...]

  5. [...] I’m not your life mate. I’m not your boss. I’m not your editor. I’m not your parents. I’m not your font of all wisdom. [...]

  6. [...] of the week: This goes to Bill Dorman  for his awesome post Social media Pedestals over at Danny Browns [...]

  7. [...] I’m not your life mate. I’m not your boss. I’m not your editor. I’m not your parents. I’m not your font of all wisdom. [...]

  8. [...] My friend Bill Dorman is so awesome that he guest posted on the Danny Brown blog.  But I am not placing his post here because he is a friend and supporter of RWAHM, but because he gives great insight.  Definitely read The Social Media Pedestal. [...]

  9. [...] The Social Media Pedestal – August 15, 2011 [...]

  10. [...] was asked to guest post at Danny Brown’s and Lori’s Life, for Instance these past two weeks. I accepted but it was with trepidation [...]

  11. [...] addition to it being my birth month, I had guest post opportunities from good friends Danny Brown and Lori Gosselin and it turned out to be quite the party indeed. On top of that, I had two [...]

  12. [...] minute Ari Herzog wrote an article about him. He’s had two very successful guest postings over at Danny Brown’s and Lori Gosselin’s that turned into raving parties. And, to top things off, he got The [...]

  13. [...] The Social Media Pedestal (dannybrown.me) [...]


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