Because We Never Failed

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Never fail

As children, we have unbridled aspirations.

We dream to be astronauts. We dream to be explorers. We dream to be princesses. We dream to be the world’s greatest sports star. We dream.

Looking back at our childhood dreams, we rarely feel we failed because we didn’t become the astronaut. Or marry the prince. Or found new lands. Or had stadiums cheering our name.

Instead, we look back and remember a time when dreams had no limits, and anything was possible, even if (in reality) it never was.

Yet we never use the fail word. Because, in truth, we never failed.

Just because something didn’t happen doesn’t mean it’s a failure. Far from it.

That failed astronaut? Perhaps he became a doctor and found a cure for cancer.

That failed princess? Perhaps she became a politician and ended global hunger.

That failed sports star? Perhaps he became an author and wrote the book that changed the world forever.

Failure is simply a word. A perception of what might have been versus what is. Another path on an ongoing journey. Something that only exists because we allow it to.

And if we allow failure to exist, then we can also disallow it. And if we disallow it, then we can think the way we did as children. Where one dream not realized becomes another dream still to happen.

Because if something can still happen, then it hasn’t failed. And if failure hasn’t yet happened? Then perhaps it never will.

image: JoePhilipson

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About Danny

Danny Brown is Chief Technologist at ArCompany and an award-winning marketer and blogger. His blog is recognized as the #1 marketing blog in the world by HubSpot. Danny is also co-author of Influence Marketing: How to Create, Manage and Measure Brand Influencers in Social Media Marketing.

116 comments
MercedesCampbell
MercedesCampbell

The world is full of ordinary people striving to something extraordinary. Even if you never achieve the dream, there's so much to be said about the journey.

MercedesCampbell
MercedesCampbell

The world is full of ordinary people striving to something extraordinary. Even if you never achieve the dream, there's so much to be said about the journey.

Vihangi Nagda
Vihangi Nagda

Thanks Danny,

Life is really not that complicated. :)

Cheers

Vihangi Nagda
Vihangi Nagda

Thanks Danny, Life is really not that complicated. :) Cheers

Anders Michael
Anders Michael

Thank you for the post Danny. I can't seem to shake the idea that we will always remain children. Whether our dreams turn out as expected or change in time, our dreams are the source of our drive. In this sense, if we never fail, then what is success?

Danny
Danny

Oooh, great question Anders.

I guess one way to look at it would be how do we want to be viewed? It may be that to be truly successful, we need X amount of people to like us. But if one person truly loves us unequivocably, that's more successful than the larger number.

Or maybe I'm just being flaky. ;-)

Anders Michael
Anders Michael

Thank you for the post Danny. I can't seem to shake the idea that we will always remain children. Whether our dreams turn out as expected or change in time, our dreams are the source of our drive. In this sense, if we never fail, then what is success?

Danny
Danny

Oooh, great question Anders. I guess one way to look at it would be how do we want to be viewed? It may be that to be truly successful, we need X amount of people to like us. But if one person truly loves us unequivocably, that's more successful than the larger number. Or maybe I'm just being flaky. ;-)

Samantha
Samantha

Danny, this is a very enlightening perspective on "failure"... We dream big as children, and many of us never achieve that dream in adulthood, but go on to be great people and do great things... things we couldn't possibly conceive as a child...

Danny
Danny

That's a great point you make, Samantha. Dreams are one thing (and should never be stifled); but often it's what we achieve outside our dreams that really define us.

Thanks for the thoughtful comment!

Samantha
Samantha

Danny, this is a very enlightening perspective on "failure"... We dream big as children, and many of us never achieve that dream in adulthood, but go on to be great people and do great things... things we couldn't possibly conceive as a child...

Danny
Danny

That's a great point you make, Samantha. Dreams are one thing (and should never be stifled); but often it's what we achieve outside our dreams that really define us. Thanks for the thoughtful comment!

Dan Lew
Dan Lew

Inspiring post Danny!

The reason that most of us failed in our careers is because we are too afraid to fail and keep thinking negative. For sure, it will always haunt for the rest of our lives. Before throwing in the towel, we should realize that we still get nothing if we don't keep trying. Just never give up, learn from your failures, keep trying until you succeed!

Cheers!

Dan Lew

Danny
Danny

Great point, Dan.

The ironic thing about that is the folks that are afraid to fail are often the ones who look back in later life and think, "What if?".

Funny how that works out, mate. ;-)

Dan Lew
Dan Lew

Inspiring post Danny! The reason that most of us failed in our careers is because we are too afraid to fail and keep thinking negative. For sure, it will always haunt for the rest of our lives. Before throwing in the towel, we should realize that we still get nothing if we don't keep trying. Just never give up, learn from your failures, keep trying until you succeed! Cheers! Dan Lew

Danny
Danny

Great point, Dan. The ironic thing about that is the folks that are afraid to fail are often the ones who look back in later life and think, "What if?". Funny how that works out, mate. ;-)

Felicia Gopaul
Felicia Gopaul

My thoughts exactly. Failure isn't in children's vocabulary. They're persistent as ever, they always dream the biggest, and they're happy! Danny, you've somehow opened my eyes here in giving a very basic, yet deep perspective on Failure (or it's non-existence). If you wanna define success, you really just to have to look at children

Danny
Danny

Hi Felicia,

As the dad of a two-year old boy and a newly-born daughter, I know they're going to be surprising me with their imagination for years to come.

As it should be. :)

Felicia Gopaul
Felicia Gopaul

My thoughts exactly. Failure isn't in children's vocabulary. They're persistent as ever, they always dream the biggest, and they're happy! Danny, you've somehow opened my eyes here in giving a very basic, yet deep perspective on Failure (or it's non-existence). If you wanna define success, you really just to have to look at children

Danny
Danny

Hi Felicia, As the dad of a two-year old boy and a newly-born daughter, I know they're going to be surprising me with their imagination for years to come. As it should be. :)

Susane
Susane

I try to even get the word 'failure' out of my mind...A few years ago I was still very strict about what achieving your goals successfully means....But I currently believe that there is value in being flexible, as well. In considering different perspectives and approaching life from different angles...

Danny
Danny

Hi Susane (love the name, by the way!),

Completely agree - the strongest companies and people are the ones who don't need to stay rigid to their goals.

Cheers!

Susane
Susane

I try to even get the word 'failure' out of my mind...A few years ago I was still very strict about what achieving your goals successfully means....But I currently believe that there is value in being flexible, as well. In considering different perspectives and approaching life from different angles...

Danny
Danny

Hi Susane (love the name, by the way!), Completely agree - the strongest companies and people are the ones who don't need to stay rigid to their goals. Cheers!

dave friant
dave friant

Nicely put, failure a part of life for better or worse. Failing hardly makes one a faliure. My favorite Robert Kiyosaki quote has to do with if you want to be good at something you need to learn to fail faster at it.

But what of dreams that do come true as well. We need more dreamers in the world who are not afraid to fail. Dreamers who fail shrug their shoulders and move on.

Danny
Danny

Hi Dave,

You just need to look at Apple and their success, and wonder what type of company it would have been (if any) without the late, great Steve Jobs. The world's greatest dreamer? Perhaps... ;-)

dave friant
dave friant

Nicely put, failure a part of life for better or worse. Failing hardly makes one a faliure. My favorite Robert Kiyosaki quote has to do with if you want to be good at something you need to learn to fail faster at it. But what of dreams that do come true as well. We need more dreamers in the world who are not afraid to fail. Dreamers who fail shrug their shoulders and move on.

Danny
Danny

Hi Dave, You just need to look at Apple and their success, and wonder what type of company it would have been (if any) without the late, great Steve Jobs. The world's greatest dreamer? Perhaps... ;-)

Jackie Lampugnano
Jackie Lampugnano

What a great post to read on a Monday morning. As always, I love the "insights" section of your blog more than anything. Hope all is well!

Danny
Danny

Thanks, Jackie! All good here - just preparing for the second addition to the family, so fun times. :)

Hope you're good, miss.

Jackie Lampugnano
Jackie Lampugnano

What a great post to read on a Monday morning. As always, I love the "insights" section of your blog more than anything. Hope all is well!

Danny
Danny

Thanks, Jackie! All good here - just preparing for the second addition to the family, so fun times. :) Hope you're good, miss.

Mark Longbottom
Mark Longbottom

Powerfull as ever Danny, i managed to not get to be the best Rugby League player the world ever knew. I did find out i was related to one of them though, I just went on to help people share their passion and to be able to make contact with real people. Which feels like being on top of the world when someone says Thanks :)

Danny
Danny

Who's the player, mate? Loved the League when I still lived in England, went to a ton of games - good times!

That's so true - just the ability to help someone and change their day? That's powerful shit right there mate, and to hang with what all these influencer tools say otherwise... ;-)

Mark Longbottom
Mark Longbottom

The player was an Australian who came to play for my home team Huddersfield and scored 77 trys in 1911/12 a world record and then the year after scored 80 tries which has never been beaten. He married my grandfathers cousin adn stayed in England till he died in 1970. My dad recalled him being around when they were playing in the fields and asking him to answer refereeing decisions.

The change thing has happened for me through my artwork connecting people and now through the internet whether business or creative - it's the biggest conceptual artwork I could have dreamed of when doing my degree.

Mark Longbottom
Mark Longbottom

Powerfull as ever Danny, i managed to not get to be the best Rugby League player the world ever knew. I did find out i was related to one of them though, I just went on to help people share their passion and to be able to make contact with real people. Which feels like being on top of the world when someone says Thanks :)

Danny
Danny

Who's the player, mate? Loved the League when I still lived in England, went to a ton of games - good times! That's so true - just the ability to help someone and change their day? That's powerful shit right there mate, and to hang with what all these influencer tools say otherwise... ;-)

Mark Longbottom
Mark Longbottom

The player was an Australian who came to play for my home team Huddersfield and scored 77 trys in 1911/12 a world record and then the year after scored 80 tries which has never been beaten. He married my grandfathers cousin adn stayed in England till he died in 1970. My dad recalled him being around when they were playing in the fields and asking him to answer refereeing decisions. The change thing has happened for me through my artwork connecting people and now through the internet whether business or creative - it's the biggest conceptual artwork I could have dreamed of when doing my degree.

Mark Aylward
Mark Aylward

Hey Danny
This is a very big deal and it keeps people from moving forward in the same way fear does. I just watched the movie "Yes Man" again and although it's not a great movie it's a very cool message. Just say yes to things that scare you and magic starts to happen. It's not always easy, but... How about a Red Bull:)
Mark

Danny
Danny

Okay, now you have me intrigued by "Yes Man", mate - I'm going to have to IMDB that sucker. :)

Mark Aylward
Mark Aylward

Jim Carrey is the lead - FYI. The first 30 minutes is worth your time...then I'll leave it up to you.
Peace

Mark Aylward
Mark Aylward

Hey Danny This is a very big deal and it keeps people from moving forward in the same way fear does. I just watched the movie "Yes Man" again and although it's not a great movie it's a very cool message. Just say yes to things that scare you and magic starts to happen. It's not always easy, but... How about a Red Bull:) Mark

Danny
Danny

Okay, now you have me intrigued by "Yes Man", mate - I'm going to have to IMDB that sucker. :)

Mark Aylward
Mark Aylward

Jim Carrey is the lead - FYI. The first 30 minutes is worth your time...then I'll leave it up to you. Peace

Tom Chapman
Tom Chapman

I think in today's world where people expect instant results, it's easy to consider yourself a failure.
I don't like the work "fail" as after a while it takes away the motivation to try.

There are normally lessons to be learnt from each setback and as such they are all steps on the learning curve - looking at it from this perspective each setback is a small step forward on the path to success - quite probably that setback means you have to set off down a different path.

As your example illustrates, the budding astraunaut's path took her to becoming an acclaimed doctor instead.

It is however, truly amazing when you do acheive one of those childhood dreams!

Danny
Danny

You know, one of the overreaching points that's coming across in the comments, mate, is the childhood dream versus the adult reality.

I'm wondering if we encourage kids to fail more, and not have to "win at all costs", we make for better ways of thinking to start with?

Tom Chapman
Tom Chapman

I think in today's world where people expect instant results, it's easy to consider yourself a failure. I don't like the work "fail" as after a while it takes away the motivation to try. There are normally lessons to be learnt from each setback and as such they are all steps on the learning curve - looking at it from this perspective each setback is a small step forward on the path to success - quite probably that setback means you have to set off down a different path. As your example illustrates, the budding astraunaut's path took her to becoming an acclaimed doctor instead. It is however, truly amazing when you do acheive one of those childhood dreams!

Danny
Danny

You know, one of the overreaching points that's coming across in the comments, mate, is the childhood dream versus the adult reality. I'm wondering if we encourage kids to fail more, and not have to "win at all costs", we make for better ways of thinking to start with?

Glenn Wallis
Glenn Wallis

I would like to agree with the comments above which review this great post, so positively.

An interesting pattern I see when working with people who avoid failure where possible, is that they show traits of perfectionism, which is so debilitating and, in order to prevent appearing foolish, results in people not trying.

Young children don't worry about this too much but with the influence of parents/carers and peers can end up in this space very easily. "Colour inside the line !" - keep the spirit of adventure alive and deny the power of perfectionism.

Danny
Danny

Hi Glenn,

So very true. If you think about it, it's our imprefections that make us "perfect" anyways, since allowing the frailties and "weaknesses" we have to show in public makes us fuller people.

Funny how that works... ;-)


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